“A soulmate is an ongoing connection with another individual that the soul picks up again in various times and places over lifetimes.” — Edgar Cayce
Let's take a trip back to August of 2004. I was excited to meet up with my friends for our first day of 5th grade. We had Mr. Lucas and he was supposed to be the best teacher! While we were unpacking, a new student walked in. I thought he was super cute with tan skin, dark brown hair, and brown eyes. He quickly joined our friend group and played with us at recess every day. Man oh man, did I have the biggest crush on this kid but he "liked" my best friend and she liked him. So, while I continued to have a crush on him all year, we remained just friends and played at recess every day without him knowing about my crush. At the end of the year, he moved to a different school and I went on to middle school and on with life. I thought that was the end of it. Boy was I wrong, because that kid. That kid was Brendan.
In the fall of 2013, I went through my first serious breakup. It was the first heartbreak I ever experienced and I was away at college. One day, while I was trying to stay distracted I was scrolling through Facebook and came across a name that I remembered. Brendan... I looked through his pictures and he was still as cute as ever with his tan skin, dark hair, and brown eyes. I quickly added him on Facebook and nervously reached out to him.
Surprisingly, he responded quickly telling me all about how he was in the military and stationed in Japan. We talked all day every day despite the time difference. We would Facetime and talk to each other's friends. Everything was perfect besides him living in Japan. He knew I was having a hard time with the distance and worrying whether we would truly connect in person like we did online. He had no doubt that we would but I felt like we were going to be wasting each other's time if it didn't work out. In the hope to ease some of my anxieties, he had his sister meet me and give me 2 of his shirts. I wore these shirts every day to bed. Unfortunately, I let my anxieties get the best of me and ended things with Brendan before I truly gave it a chance to start. Honestly, it is one of my biggest regrets. Knowing the time we could have together was cut even shorter because I let my anxiety get the best of me.
Brendan reached out once after that but I was in a relationship with someone else. He told me how much I had broken his heart but he understood. This was extremely hard to process because I hated knowing I hurt him. I hated that I couldn't fix it.
Fast forward to April 2016.
I had been single for a few months and was scrolling through Facebook when a post caught my attention.
I'm home from Japan. If anyone wants to hang out, hit me up!
I felt like time stood still. I was so hopeful and excited to reach out to him. This was my chance... Brendan was home. We could see if our connection was the real thing. But I faced one very real problem… Would Brendan want to talk to me?
I was not going to let my anxieties get the better of me this time.
I texted him immediately.
"Hey, it's Brooklyn. I saw you were home. I would love to catch up if you want to talk."
"Hey"
Oh snap! He answered! My immediate thought was There was a chance! I had another shot at this.
Again, we texted all day every day because I was still away at college, but I couldn’t wait to meet up in person.
It was like nothing had changed. We still had an amazing connection over text, so I just knew it was going to work this time.
May 2016
I am invited to a graduation party for someone I went to college with. She says I can bring a friend! Of course, I ask Brendan and he agrees!
I drove to his house to pick him up so we could ride together. I was so nervous, with all my anxieties coming back. What if the connection wasn’t there? What if we didn’t click? What if it was awkward?
And, since you know how this story ends, my anxiety was for nothing.
We clicked so well. We talked about anything and everything. We laughed. Listened to music. The best part was that even the silence felt comfortable.
We enjoyed the party; we hung out and chatted for a while. We said our goodbyes and when we were walking to the car he stopped me in the driveway. Turned and looked at me. Then kissed me.
And just like a movie said the words a girl like me swoons over:
" I have been waiting to do that all night"
I melted! My heart was beating fast and I couldn't stop smiling. I did not want that night to end.
(Taking 3 years later in the same spot)
Luckily it didn't. He invited me over to watch a movie. I met his Grandparents and dad that night and we stayed up most of the night talking and watching movies. When I got ready to leave. He asked me to stay.
I was expecting him to ask that. I was instantly stunned.
There was no way I was telling this man no. So I stayed and we fell asleep cuddled on a couch. I was comfortable, being with him was comfortable.
We woke up the next morning to his grandma making tacos, and I remember thinking:
I am going to marry this man even if it's solely for his grandma.
That night was how I knew. I knew this was going to be it. There was no denying it. We were comfortable and then his grandma made my favorite food. That man was going to be stuck with me forever.
We were inseparable after that day.
On June 12, 2012 We were laying in bed when we had the following conversation
Brendan: Do you want to go out?
Me: Out where?
Brendan: With me. Like date?
Me: OH! Duhh yes!
The first 11 months of our relationship were considered "long distance". While it was only a little over an hour separating us Brendan was living on base and I was working full time. We realized quickly we preferred being together than apart, so I started staying with him days at a time on base and then I drove us both home for the weekend. When we were on base we were crammed in a small room with nothing to do but spend time talking and getting to know each other better.
As soon as he parted from the military we moved in together. First in my parent's basement and then in our townhouse. We were living the dream. The great thing about our relationship was we spent so much time getting to know one another that we knew how the other communicated so we rarely fought.
Fast forward to December 2017. We were opening presents at Brendan's grandparents. There was a decent size box with my name on it but for some reason, Brendan kept telling me I had to wait until I opened it. This was weird; why was I having to wait and what was in the box? I hadn't asked for anything for Christmas.
Once everyone was done, I was still waiting to open my present and he left the room! What was going on? I was getting ready to follow Brendan into the kitchen when Melissa (Brendan's sister) told me to come look at a specific ornament on the Christmas tree. This was odd but I did it anyway.
In the picture frame beside the tree, I could see Brendan's reflection as he dropped to one knee and told me to turn around. I was speechless and shaking.
Brooklyn, I love you so much. Will you marry me?
All I could do was nod my head. I was so happy and speechless and couldn't wait to marry the love of my life. Finally, he told me I could open my Christmas present and that's when it clicked.
I'll learn to play Xbox with you when we are engaged
My present was an Xbox.
We got married 6 months later on the hottest day of the summer July 1, 2018. We had a beautiful and short outside ceremony, a bonfire with our closest friends, and brunch the next morning. I could not have asked for a better day.
2 weeks after our wedding we moved to WV for Brendan to attend school. Neither one of us were the biggest plans of where we lived at that point. Honestly, I think the house was haunted but we loved it being just the 2 of us. Until, unexpectedly, I was pregnant. I was so happy and Brendan was scared. We hadn't planned for this but we were so ready.
We had Oakley in September 2019. By April 2020, I was trying to convince Brendan to let us have another baby. He agreed in May we could start trying. While I got pregnant quickly we ended up having a miscarriage early on. To our surprise, we found out we were pregnant a month later... with TWINS!
We were living our best life as a family of 5. 3 little boys under the age of 2 who were obsessed with their dad. Most people who met Brendan said that he was kind of an asshole but that was because Brendan had no problem saying how he felt. He loved me and the boys fiercely and we were his soft spot; just as he was ours.
You could always see the love we had for each other in our pictures. We supported each other no matter what and did everything we could to make the other person happy. We made deals and compromises to ensure we were both always happy.
What most people don't know was 2 months before the accident Brendan and I made another one of our deals. He would upgrade his motorcycle and we would start trying for another baby. This was the only deal where we both didn't end up with what we wanted.
Brendan died exactly a week before our 4th wedding anniversary. My life forever changed that day.
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